Thailand: what I learned

Part 1: what you really need to pack

Before we left for Thailand we decided to go lighter than our usual two suitcases.

A large part of our weight is toys, so we gave ourselves a bigger budget to buy toys on the go. I still packed some books and dolls. That was very wise. My children love books, it's a primary part of our eduction at home, and paper trumps screen for children. We found two places which sold a few English books for children, but its sparse, especially on the islands. So bring a small but very resilient selection, like fairy tales that have true depth. Dolls in Thailand are plastic so if you want natural material bring your own. You can get plenty of stuffed elephants and things like that. We easily found remote control trucks and collected natural material blocks, bought beautiful silk scarves and got lots of art materials.

I packed too many clothes. And I packed very little of that to start with. Clothes are cheap in Thailand and suited for the weather. They are thin and light weight. So pack clothes for two days and buy there. What you pay for is what you get in quality, so expect the clothes to thread fast if they are cheap. I used and shed some clothes and took a few more expensive items back home.

I also read blogs that said you need waterproof stuff. I never used ours. When it rained we got inside. We have small kids and we didn't want to be standing in dumping rain with them. The rain doesn't last long anyway. The most useful item I brought with me were my silk shirts. They are light and protect my skin. You can find good and suitable shoes easily. Wear a pair on the plane and buy there if you need more. There are plenty of imported shoes for adults and children. Think shoes that have some traction on the sole for grip and can easily dry out.

Buy and pack sunblock and if you are a woman your special cosmetics. Don't pack toothpaste, shampoo, soap etc. The sunblock in Thailand is not natural or high quality, and its expensive. I bought mine while in France, the best of the best for babies, and the weight was golden, well worth carrying. I brought my own face wash and creams. You can get lots of organic coconut products and I used those for soap, shampoo and conditioner. You can also easily buy cheap and good swim wear there, but it's useful to bring lightweight towels. I used long sleeve swim tops and so did the children. It saved our skin.

In the end we took one check in suitcase, Emrah carried a large backpack and I had a small carry on backpack. On our return we checked in the backpack and used our spare second, small carry on. We ended up bringing back more than we left with, but not that much.

 If you take special vitamins bring them. I take magnesium citrate and could not find it. In general Thailand doesn't sell much in the way of supplements.

Part 2: what didn't work

Thailand ended up being much more expensive than we anticipated. We ended up in Thailand in part as a way to be somewhere beautiful without huge expense. If you are not a backpacker and single then it's much more expensive than it may seem. Especially if you have children with you. Of course this depends on how much comfort you are willing to sacrifice, but if it's a long stay and your children are young you will probably end up wanting more comfort than you anticipate. Accommodation, flights and car/scooter rental are costs that add up and can catch you if you are unprepared. Don't underestimate the cost of being in Thailand.

Prior to coming to Thailand I had an ideal about the nature retreat it would be. In reality the abundant nature is not very accessible if you have small children with you. The heat can make being outdoors for long periods of time exhausting, and the sun scorches your skin after a while. I never got burnt but I covered up with clothes and sunblock fastidiously. Our small children would become grumpy monsters once they overheated so we had to balance indoor and outdoor time. Mosquitoes are abundant and as soon as you get near the gorgeous green jungle they attack with a vehemence. I'm a friend of insects, spiders and snakes. And the jungle once you get close to it has real danger - plants that made my sons arms feel like they were on fire, snakes that kill, spiders that seem truly terrifying and so on. Basically you avoid the jungle with little babies. That means you stick to beach and sea experiences - as much as you can take of it, home and being in town. Nature was more of a view than a direct experience for me there and we do a lot of nature time generally.

Having small kids in tow was amazing on many levels. I'll get to that. But having little children was always very limiting and difficult in Thailand. We traveled with a two and four year old and they did impeccably. And they could only handle so much heat, noise, delays, mosquito bites, being on the beach and noodles. Thailand expanded their vision of our world and it was worth it. But two months was too long and too demanding on us with little kids. This may change if you want to live there but we were passing through.

Ko Tao Island proved to be one of our biggest mistakes. I seriously over estimated my capabilities. I rented a place up high on a hill, and you can only get around the island on a motorbike. Luckily my man is an excellent rider and got us up and down and around safely. All four of us piled on one bike and the children thought it was fantastic fun. It was and it was also dangerous and crazy on those roads. The island was also way more touristy than Koh Samui. Its a divers heaven, so it's basically jacked for tourists with money. The western food is excellent, proper coffee abundant, and non Thai faces everywhere. Our children were too young to dive or enjoy what there is up for offer. And I quickly got tired of the intense tourist scene. We aborted a planned three week stay and left after three nights. Although I managed to get a bit of a refund on the accommodation, we lost about four hundred dollars as a result.

Part 3: what worked

The food is amazing. I loved the soups and curries, the grilled fish and sea food. The fruit is incredible. Think mango and pineapple, papaya, banana, dragon fruit, litchis. The fresh coriander, carrots had broccoli were excellent. Food is also very cheap and it's usually cheaper to eat out. We either ate out or got take away for most dinners. I cooked a bit for the children because rice and noodles just wasn't enough. Stick with Thai food mostly, and go for the small and local places on the side of the road. Always go for cooked food because it's safer. And any produce I bought I would wash well and peel if possible. In Chaing Mai there was incredible Japanese ramen and sushi. Indian food is also fairly abundant and good. Thailand is a food heaven.

The temples and religious symbols everywhere were the most evocative part of being in Thailand. I felt submerged in a different dream there and the gods I felt and saw impacted me. Our children felt that symbolism too. The learned about Ganesh and Buddha, offerings and praying. The spiritual symbolism lives on every corner in tiny shrines with small gods living inside. We visited many temples and spoke to the children about what we saw. People go to Thailand for the beach. Go to Thailand for the religious imagery, it awakens something in you and you get to take that awareness home.

Renting a place with a swimming pool was sublime. I was initially dismissive of this idea but my man pushed for it and he was right. Its hot and having a pool to swim in escalates the quality of your life in great measure. My favorite time of the day was our swim altogether at night, under the stars, after dinner. In Chaing Mai we did not rent a pool but there was much more to do. If you can spend more and get a pool, preferably a salt water one.

Outsourcing cleaning and laundry is cheap and a nice burden off your back. I enjoyed being able to get my place cleaned twice a week. You can often negotiate this included in your rental and you should do that. Thailand offers luxuries often unaffordable in the West, and for a woman it's the lifting of housework.

Part 4: would we go back

Not to Thailand but yes to Asia. Thailand was transforming for us and I didn't fall in love with it. We loved being out of the western stream. And the Western stream is taking over Thailand rapidly. We took home little statues of gods that spoke to us and dreams for the future that challenge us to go for our purpose. Life will change greatly in many ways from this trip. Its a good place to come to if you want to drop out of the grit of western life and experiment with doing what you always wanted to do. Its even better if you can take the dreams you find there and bring them back to your known territory. That is integration and I think that is when the travel experiences become really useful.