What You really Need for an Infant: Less is Best for the Little One
To be nomadic requires a desire to be light. Materially this translates into asking the question: what do you really need? Putting this question to the test when providing for an infant verified again for me that you really don't need much. You just need what is necessary for the moment. That moment is a period of time that makes sense. And you need to honour desire too, for some beauty and things of quality and whatever else your nature moves towards.
This is what my answer was for the first three months of my babalina's life.
Clothes - not much and only for the first three months. Friends sent me some clothes too so I had to cull and only chose the ones I love. I launder so much I really could get away with under ten items. I prefer nothing too fancy, pure cotton and easy to put on and off. As she grows I will replace small clothes with bigger ones. No need to have a huge stash.
Blankets - I have 6 of them, all pure cotton except for one wool blanket I knitted.
Cloth diaper stash - the reason why I do laundry so much. I did disposable for the first two weeks to make it easier on myself (plus the poo is super sticky the first few days). There will be a post on cloth diapers as the subject is worthy of an essay, but suffice to say they take work to learn and its worth it. My stash is small of about 16 prefolds, 5 covers and 2 diaper pail liners that you can throw into the wash with your diapers. It helps to have snappies to secure the diaper.
Changing table stuff - I use a diaper wipe solution of oils (tea tree, lavender, jojoba and chamomile). A few squirts of that into a small bowl with water and voila. You can get more fancy with distilled water or witch hazel but really water is just fine. Then you need cloth wipes, about 20 of them. You can use them for burping and spit up. They are the all round go to. Some powder and rash cream both as natural as possible (I use Weleda products). I change my babe on a soft towel that is folded up.
Bath soap again as natural as possible. I just use a small plastic tub but you can use a sink too.
A diaper bag - I got the ergo one - which is indispensable for being on the go. I keep it simple with diapers, bags, a small rash cream, some wipes and a spray for wipe solution.
Now for the most important part if you are nomad - the carriers.
Sling - Useful to put her to sleep as she is close to my body. Great for the first few weeks and after that it started killing my back. Eventually I hated and so did my baby. It is super easy to put babe in and out but after a certain weight it doesn't do justice to my body for long periods.
Ergo carrier with infant insert - I get stopped all the time by mother's who ask about this carrier. It saves your back and the insert lets you use it from birth; it is pretty and she sleeps well in it. The insert did make Ruya too warm so I eventually got another carrier.
Moby wrap - I love this wrap. It is great for an infant and very versatile. I like that it is cotton and once you learn the wrap it is easy to play with and use. It takes a few goes to get the wrap right but the work is worth it. My little one is snug against my body and doesn't get too hot. I can kiss her head and pat her back just like the ergo carrier, but somehow she feels closer to me because of the cloth.
Women have been carrying their babes forever. The carrier is her little pouch and nest on the go.
Bed - I first tried a hammock but ended up co-sleeping. My bed is hers. Having her close by and in the same room feels right to me and my partner. Breastfeeding at night is easier and when you are moving around being able to share a bed is very useful. Plus cuddling is greatly facilitated.
As for the mama I have needed lanolin (the saviour of nipples), cotton breast pads for leakage, 3 nursing bra's and a small torch to use at night - it helps to get the day/night reality going for the little one if you keep lights to a minimum at night, hence the small torch.
Traveling with an infant - category nomad lifestyle
Ruya is four months old now and on her way to having three countries stamped on her passport - Turkey, South Africa and Greece. Traveling with an infant is an adventure of its very own, especially since the setup isn't geared towards them. So I am on the hunt to find ways to make it a bit more seamless and alot easier on both of us.
Flight carriers
Lufthansa charges $250 each way for an infant. Turkish Airlines charges $150. They both let you check in a bag for your babe. And so far it seems like they both are slightly lenient on the carry on stuff, since you have to bring more than just one bag. I got a bassinet for her and she did go to sleep in it, so I highly recommend this if your little one is willing to be put down. Also when traveling on your own as I did, you want a place to put baba down other than on your lap. The seats are way comfier generally on Turkish Airlines and the food is better, so thus far they are my top pick.
Booking flights
Beware of Priceline and Expedia! The website does not allow you to add an infant so the price you get is not the real deal. So far I think its best to go with a travel agent if you have one. Once you book call the flight carrier and request the bassinet if you can. Turkish Airlines put this request through but Lufthansa did not. We had to arrive early at the airport to get it.
Carry on baggage
The first time I took way too much. What you really need is a carry on suitcase that is light weight so you can wheel it easily behind you. And then your diaper changing bag. I carry a small purse too with the passports and money in it. I am all about carriers so I can't say anything about taking a stroller. I prefer putting her into a carrier because it is quick, easy and you can walk fast to catch connections. Also it is lighter in terms of what you bring. When it is just me and my bub with long haul flights the less the better. The diaper changing bag needs a change of clothing in it and a lightweight blanket rolled up. Mine has external pockets where I stash a few burp cloths, my cell phone and some snacks. The carry on needs another blanket, another change of clothing (poops blast out of their seams), more burp cloths and extra diapers. Then the usual precious stuff I won't check in - iPad and external keyboard, chargers, jewelry, Boss speaker (brilliant lightweight sound system that comes into good use every evening for Ruya's ocean put to sleep music), international plug (you only need one plug for 150 countries, count on the Swiss for this), important documents like Ruya's medical records and vaccine cards and so on. I add to this my yoga mat in a bag which easily straps onto the carry on suitcase. Useful extra's are a nursing top to cover up on the plane (though I never ended up using this), and an extra top for yourself since spit up really accumulates on you after eight hours.
On the plane
Nurse your child for take off and landing. This is easier said then done especially when you can't wake up your baby, but I tried to do this every time and it really helped.
Just act like everything is normal. I didn't make a fuss about the fact that we were on a plane. I kept to her routine in terms of bedtime and following her cues when she was tired or hungry. I let her sleep when she was tired and when she was awake I spoke to her and played with her on my lap. I nursed a lot to keep her hydrated and took my time changing her diaper, like I always do, chatting to her about what was going on around us. Drink tons of water if you are nursing. I did and still got dehydrated which showed me how much we dry out up in the air.
I believe babies pick up on your emotions. Coddling them more will just make them more fussy. I made sure to care for Ruya and be extra gentle knowing that her ears might be hurting and there are weird noises around her, but didn't go overboard trying to soothe her. The biggest challenge is crying. Babies cry but somehow this universal wisdom vanishes when you are on a plane. Of course I wanted to keep her quieter for others, and at the same time we are sharing a space. The fact that today's culture does not integrate the reality of children and their needs, should not stop mothers and fathers from bringing that reality into the public space. Ruya cried a bit and when she did, I did what I usually do. I let her speak and tried to work out what she was saying and respond. Shutting her up was not going to help her or me, and would escalate it anyway. I breastfed in public, discreetly, but without shame. And I made sure to assert myself when people were insensitive to my limitations with an infant.
I love traveling, and now with child the getting to and from places has become more of a process. But by doing it early and often she adapts. I see it already. Traveling places her in new contexts and the best thing I did was to go on excursions almost daily from when she was two weeks old. We were in the same place for the first eleven weeks and didn't need to go out much but I made a point of it. And that helped her and me to learn what it takes to be out in the world together. I still take her out almost every day for some little adventure, be it just a small boat ride across the Bosphorus. She learns, as I do, how to travel together.
